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Scared of college


 I already tell ya that 2 month later i would be in college and being an english literature student, i leave my hometown take everything i need and live in my boarding house. I never experience this kind of situation because i used to school near of my hometown i didn't go anywhere since i was a kid. So it's kinda hard for me to think that what would happen to me when i finally leave this house, i'm scared of everything. It haunts me lately because i start over thinking of situation i will face, i'm scared of being alone and don't have a friend. It's my nightmare, bacause i'm an introvert person and have a social anxiety it's hard for me to having a relationship with a stranger. Actually for now i have this new student group chat and i know them for now but, i'm just scared what if when we already in collage and i didn't  fill their expectation? maybe they would leave me, it's ok if it's happen i'm just gonna breath and continue my life but God, send to me a good friend please.

I know college is comprehensive, it's not like high school where full with a teenager who ruin everything, college is more than that, and every type of person is exist there. Maybe i'm excited a little, because i want to change my self there like i want to make a relation with people, develop my skills, and being in an organization to live. I admire a person who brave being in a public space and just talk everything they want without feel nervous, oh i wish i can. Maybe it's hard for them for the first time, i believe that, but at the end of the day they made it and i'm so proud of them because of the process it's not what it looks like. They are working really hard, is a privilege matter? it work for some people but on the other hand they should to work really hard to reach that.

The questions for my self that should have the answer maybe in the next year 

1. Are you be a good student?

2. Are you have a relation there?

3. Are u have a lot of friends?

4. Do our english is working out better?

5. Are you survive?

you better answer that in future duh




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